


dissonance

by VeggiesforPresident (luridCavum)



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Closeted Character, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Gen, Kissing, M/M, Sexual Repression, ignorance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-14
Updated: 2018-11-14
Packaged: 2019-08-23 12:41:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16619165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luridCavum/pseuds/VeggiesforPresident
Summary: "Dude, I pop boners for dudes, am I gay? No. I wanna kiss dudes, am I gay? No. So, like, kissing dudes? Not gay.”A study in denial, and guys being dudes.





	dissonance

**Author's Note:**

> T for swearing and canon-typical drug use and internalized homophobia

6:30 pm on a Tuesday

Charlie’s apartment is infested with rats. This is nothing new, but apparently Mac’s… everything is way more sensitive than Charlie’s, so Mac has put a temporary ban on hanging out at Charlie’s place. At least until the rats are gone, or until they stop fucking in the dumpsters and the water pipes. It’s fine. The landlord will call an exterminator soon, Charlie’s pretty sure.

Until then, Charlie takes a backpack full of spare clothes and spray paint up to the third floor of Mac’s apartment complex. He spends his evening on Mac and Dennis’ stolen couch. One of the Matrix movies or another is on, or maybe it’s a Disney Channel Original, Charlie is too high to follow. Mac picked it out, eyes bright as he slipped it under his coat at the Blockbuster.

The Mac in question is now slung down beside Charlie, lit up blue by the movie. He’s on day-three stubble, reeks from beer and not showering since Saturday. It’s nice, watching the way Mac’s eyes dart across the screen, how his bottom lip rolls between his teeth. Charlie’s glad Mac is his best friend. 

The movie rolls on, and at some point there’s a fight scene, and one of the guys takes off his shirt. Charlie enjoys looking at him for a moment, until Mac shifts away abruptly, clenching his fist in his lap. 

“Hey Charlie?” Mac says, voice tight. Mac is no longer looking at the movie, but doesn’t pause it. If Charlie were more sober, he’d wonder why. Instead, he just grunts. 

“Hm?” 

“I got a question.” Mac sounds serious, his voice small and high; it snaps Charlie a little closer to lucidity. He sits up. 

“What’s up, buddy?” 

“I was talking to Dennis,” Mac says. That’s how most of Mac’s sentences start, ever since junior year of high school, so Charlie has no idea where the conversation is gonna end up, “About like. Guys. You know? Like how when you’re in the locker room at the gym and there are guys changing and stuff, and you get, you know.” Mac gestures down pointedly. 

“A shower?” Charlie asks. 

“What? No. Like, you know, you get. Like. You get all sweaty and stuff, and you feel like, warm inside.” 

“Warm? Like, you get butterflies?” 

“No!” Mac says, “No! None of that girly shit.” 

“Oh,” Charlie says. 

“I mean like, sometimes you get… hard?” 

“Oh! Yeah, yeah yeah yeah. I know what you mean, dude.” 

“You do?!” Mac says, glancing at Charlie out of the corner of his eye. 

“Yeah, dude,” Charlie says, “Yeah, dude, it happens all the time.” 

“Oh thank god. Dennis said that shit was gay.” 

“What? No,” Charlie says, “Nah, no, no, no, dude. That’s just normal like, guy bonding. That’s just guys being dudes!” 

“Right. Right, yeah,” Mac says, “It’s totally not gay.” 

“Nah, dude.” Charlie says, settling back into his seat. Mac relaxes too, the tension bleeding from his shoulders. He sits closer to Charlie, too, their legs brushing whenever one of them moves. 

Charlie forgets about the incident until a few weeks later. The rats have all but stopped fucking in the water pipes, so Mac deemed Charlie’s apartment the place to hang out again. Charlie kinda misses their shitty red couch, but his apartment is fine. It’s home. Plus, Mac would never admit it, but he and Dennis are fighting. Mac doesn’t like to talk about it, his face turns red and he changes the subject whenever Charlie brings it up. 

He’s reminded of the incident on Friday, around 10:15. Mac is tearing through the game, mashing buttons like his life depends on it. He’s doing a shit job, though, skipping almost all the treasure chests and fighting the guards by attacking them head-on. 

“Foul!” Charlie calls, “You lose points for that.” 

“Fuck you,” Mac says, smashing the guard with his sword until it dies and a bright red rupee appears in its place. Charlie rolls his eyes and makes a tally on his side of the score sheet. Mac owes him six bags of chips and a gram of weed, and he owes Mac two beers and a Frosty. 

To the surprise of utterly no one, Mac dies a few minutes later, and refuses to pass the controller back to Charlie. 

“Come on, dude,” Charlie says, “Rules are rules!” 

“Rules are bullshit,” Mac says, “That was clearly rigged, did you see how fast my hearts went down?” 

“Yeah, ‘cause you never use block.” 

“Fuck you,” Mac says again, but tosses the controller within arm’s reach. While Charlie is restarting, and reminding himself which buttons do what, Mac clears his throat, “So I was talking to Dennis.” 

“Oh yeah? You’re done fighting?” 

Mac’s ears go pink, “Shut up, dude. Riddle me this, kissing isn’t gay, right?” 

“What?” Charlie usually follows Mac, but this time even he can’t thread it together. 

“No like, dude,” Mac says, “We already established that popping boners in the locker rooms and shit, that’s not gay. But what about like, wanting to kiss a guy? That’s definitely gay, right? Like, guys are supposed to kiss girls.” 

Charlie makes a face, “My great-aunt would kiss me whenever I saw her, and I never wanted to stick it in her.” Now Mac makes a face, “No, look, dude. Popping boners? Normal. And kissing is like, a part of boner popping, right? So it’s gotta be normal. Plus like, friends like hug and shit, and that’s not gay. Kissing wouldn’t be any different.” 

“I guess…”Mac bites his lip and Charlie’s breath catches. 

“Besides, dude, I pop boners for dudes, am I gay? No. I wanna kiss dudes, am I gay? No. So, like, kissing dudes? Not gay.” 

Slowly, Mac breaks into a smile, “Yeah. Yeah, dude, you’re totally right.” 

Mac relaxes again, sinking further into the leg of the couch, sneaking cheese curls while Charlie is distracted. It’s almost peaceful for a while, intermittent with swears and new points about their argument on whether cats are aliens from a far-off planet (they are, clearly, but Mac has yet to be convinced.) It’s nice. 

Eventually, though, their conversation winds back around, “You wanna kiss dudes?” Mac asks, when Charlie is saving before the boss fight. 

“Oh,” Charlie says, “Yeah, sure, dude. I think it’s a part of male bonding, you know? Like WWE wrestling.” 

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Mac says, but his voice is distant. 

They’re quiet again for a while. Charlie loses the boss fight. 

“We should kiss,” Charlie says. 

Mac chokes on his cheese curl. 

When he’s done coughing, and smushing the remaining curl into the rug, he splutters out a “What?” red-faced. 

“Yeah, dude,” Charlie pauses the game and crosses his legs, “Hear me out. I’ve never kissed a guy before, and if I was gonna kiss any guy, it’d be you. You’re like, the guy.” 

“The guy,” Mac repeats, “Huh. Well, of course I’m your guy, Charlie, I’m Mac.” 

“You sound like Dennis.” 

“Shut up,” Mac says. 

“Make me,” Charlie says, before he’s had time to think about it. 

Mac makes him, surging forward and planting his mouth on Charlie’s. 

It’s a lot like kissing girls, Charlie decides, except there’s the scrape of Mac’s stubble against Charlie’s, and Mac smells like pine and beer, which no girl Charlie’s ever dated in high school smelled like. But it’s nice, because it’s Mac smell. 

Kissing Mac is really nice. 

Mac seems to really like kissing Charlie, because he sort of crawls forward, up onto the couch proper. Mac is on his stomach, chest in Charlie’s lap, kissing him like it’s all he’s wanted to do since they met; like Charlie’s chewed-up couch that constantly stinks of vomit and rat decay is a bed fit for a king; like Charlie is the most important person in the whole goddamn world, more than Dennis or Luther or even God. 

Charlie’s heart might burst for how great his friendship with Mac is. 

They break apart eventually, and Charlie’s head is warm and he can’t keep himself from smiling at Mac’s weed-brownie-brown eyes. Mac laughs, a little delirious but with a hint of husk, a sound that sends a warm spike right through Charlie’s heart. 

“That wasn’t gay,” Mac assures, although Charlie thinks it’s maybe more to himself than to Charlie. 

Charlie snorts and gets another whiff of Mac’s pine-beer-Mac smell, “No, dude,” he agrees, “Totally not gay.”

**Author's Note:**

> fellas is it gay to pop boners over other guys and also be in love with your best friend since childhood? asking for a friend
> 
> also bonus, a question, was this like... in character? its my first Sunny fic.


End file.
